2015 – Happy New Year, the year I decided would be the year I told any man I felt deserved it “To go fuck themselves,” this was my empowerment.
My voice was and has been changed forever, forgive, and forget, no one ever forgets the memory of an abuser; the abuse from the hand, fist, mouth, tongue, body that touched when they should not have, or spoke with bullets that leaves a gaping hole that heals within measure over time, but never heals in the mind, nothing is ever completely forgotten by whom, me, you, them – the scars do they ever truly heal?
For, me, To me- it is like a tree bearing witness to where there once was a branch and now – the knot, a tree knot, where a branch has become injured and dies while attached to the tree, a loose knot will form, the knot carried in the gut, but in the tree a dark plug of dead decaying material is formed and over time it comes loose and slowly disperses to become a toughened trunk of wood, but left with a scar, a hole- empty, tough and broken, was anything forgotten, forgiven, or just remembered as rotten and now released-“fuck off” and yes forgiven in measure, in time, with time- Now able to decay given away into the earth so that a new memory may bolster and blossom with intensification and awareness of its own strength, this is our voice- it should not be FORGOTTEN.